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Rating: G
Beta: hhertzof
Summary: The Doctor is no match for the combined force of Jo and Amy.
Notes: For silly_cleo

"Where are we?" Amy asked, as she looked around. It looked like some sort of country estate, which suggested it was Earth, but with the Doctor you never could tell.

"UNIT!" He grinned and walked towards the building.


"United Nations Intelligence Taskforce. Government organisation to protect the world from invading aliens. I used to work for them once."

"You?" Amy stared at him. She couldn't imagine him working at all, never mind for the government. "Was that when you met Winston Churchill?"

"No." He gave her a look that suggested she was stupid. "This is the 1970s. Or 80s. Never could remember what the date was."

He had a faraway expression on his face and Amy realised she wasn't going to get any useful answers out of him. She just hoped the people inside were more helpful.


Not only were they helpful, they made tea. Well, Jo Grant, the Doctor's assistant, did. "The Doctor's not here at the moment," she said. "The Brigadier made him take a day off. And he's actually not come in for once."

The Doctor sprang up from the stool he'd been sitting on. "The Brigadier. I should say hello."

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Jo asked, but the Doctor was already out of the door. Jo shrugged and sat down.

"There aren't going to be any alien invasions are there?" Amy half wanted to see what sort of aliens invaded England on a weekly basis, but she also didn't want to be killed before she was born.

Jo shook her head. "Probably not. It's Tuesday; the aliens usually invade on Fridays."

Amy frowned. "Do they have a timetable or something?"

"I think they do it just to annoy the Doctor." Jo grinned.

"I'm not surprised. He makes enemies everywhere he goes." Although aliens invading every week was impressive, even for him.

Jo nodded. "He does have a habit of assuming everyone's beneath him."

Amy put her mug down more forcefully than she'd intended. "He's always doing that. Half giving answers and then refusing to tell you the rest because he thinks it's obvious."

They were interrupted in their discussion about the Doctor, not to mention their tea drinking, by a soldier running into the lab. "Miss Grant, you better get down to the canteen," he said. "The Doctor's come in and now they're both fighting."

"That's just typical," Jo said as she stood up. "He never can be civil with himself."

Amy just wanted to see the Doctor fighting with himself, so she followed Jo.


In the canteen, soldiers were holding each of the Doctors back, but that didn't stop them arguing with each other.

"You think you can just come in here, like nothing ever happened," the white haired one was saying.

"Oh, and you think you own the place, do you?" Amy's Doctor countered.

Jo marched up to her Doctor. "Doctor, will you behave yourself."

The Doctor immediately quieted. Amy smiled to see him bested by someone much shorter than him. She thought she really ought to talk to the other Doctor.

"You really shouldn't antagonise him," she said.

"He started it."

Amy rolled her eyes. "Honestly, how old are you?"

The Doctor looked put out by that remark.

Amy turned her back on him. "We could just let them fight," she suggested to Jo. "They can't kill each other, can they?" The younger-looking one couldn't kill the older-looking one, because then he one wouldn't exist. The whole thought of it was making Amy's head spin.

Jo turned to face Amy, a smile on her face. "I've got a better idea."


The cells were clearly not soundproofed, given the noise coming from them. Jo told Sergeant Benton to let them out when they'd calmed down, which he didn't look terribly happy about, and then she and Amy went back up to the lab.

"I love your boots," Amy said, when Jo sat on the bench and dangled them in front of her.

"Thanks." Jo smiled at the compliment.

"70s fashions are back in fashion," Amy said, contemplatively. "I bet they were cheaper the first time round."

Jo grinned and jumped down. "Let's go shopping." She put her arm in Amy's.

"And you can tell me all about what the Doctor gets up to, so I'll have something to blackmail him with later."

Amy found Jo was very good company: she had plenty of stories about the Doctor and was a big help when the aliens invaded Oxford Street in vain hope of ridding the world of 80s fashion.

Cross posted from Angelic Paranoia - Fan Fiction
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