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[Doctor Who] Thames Octopus

Rating: G
Pairing: Sarah/Harry
Beta: hhertzof
Summary: Harry has a story.
Notes: For rivendellrose

Sarah had to keep telling herself not to worry. It was just that Harry was never late. It must mean that something had happened to him. Or something had happened to someone else and he'd stopped to help. But as much as she focused on the latter, the former kept intruding and she paced the living room.

When he did eventually step through the front door, his clothes were damp and his hair stuck up. Sarah wondered briefly if he'd got into a fight. She was torn between relief at seeing he was all right and anger at him scaring her. He could have stopped to find a phone if he tried, she was sure.

"What happened to you?" she asked as he hung up his coat and carefully left his shoes by the door. Although she'd decided on anger, her tone had come out as relief.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you, old girl."

Now she was annoyed. "Harry." This time her tone was a warning.

"I need a shower and a change of clothes," was all he said and Sarah seriously considered throttling him.

Instead, she stood outside the bathroom door and thought about how much effort she'd have to put in to break the door down. And how much more effort it would take to fix. So she made herself a cup of tea instead.

Back in the living room she settled down with a nice, hot mug of tea and told herself it was relaxing. But mostly she glared at the mug in place of glaring at Harry. She'd nearly finished it by the time he came out of the bathroom. He did at least look like everything was back in place and he smelled flowery, which meant he'd accidentally used her shower gel again. Sarah decided not to mention it and glared at him when he finished her lukewarm tea.

"Your tea's gone cold," he said, as he sat down.

Sarah folded her arms. "I'm still waiting."

He frowned. "What for?"

"For you to tell me where you've been." From the state of him she guessed that nothing that bad had happened to him at least.

"Oh." He leaned back on the sofa. "I was on my way here, taking a stroll along the Thames. It's very pretty with the lights reflecting off it." He smiled at her look. He was clearly going to take his time over the story. "The water rippled a bit, which I thought was odd, so I stopped to look. The next thing I know some monster has capsized a boat - you know, one of those tour boats for tourists. And they're not easy to capsize, believe me. Well, I couldn't just stand there, could I?"

He paused. Wondering if he wanted some sort of reaction, Sarah softly said, "Of course not."

"I thought it was the Loch Ness Monster back again for a moment. But this was far smaller and had more legs. I think it was an octopus. I didn't stop to count them, but they have eight legs, don't they?"

Sarah interrupted. "Harry, as much as I'm enjoying the story, do you think you could stick to the facts? I'd like to go to bed this side of midnight."

He looked hurt. "I am. I just thought you'd appreciate a little background."

She gave in. "Carry on, then," she said and patted him on the leg.

"Now where was I?"

Sarah gave him a look and Harry grinned.

"Ah, yes, the thing in the water - let's call it an octopus, shall we? - capsized a boat. Fortunately, there was a trained diver on a nearby boat and he jumped in to get all the people out. So I just had to worry about the octopus. And a bally great thing it was too. It probably would have filled your living room."

Sarah looked around at the room and decided she didn't want to face it, given a choice.

"The next thing I knew, something came up from the bottom of the river, nearly sucking all those people down! And it looked familiar, because it was an escape pod and the octopus was a crashed alien. With all the flailing about it was doing it was hard to get close to it in a boat, but it was coming closer to the shore, so I didn't have to. I called out to it, and I think it answered, but I didn't understand what it's saying."

"Because the TARDIS wasn't around," Sarah put in.

Harry nodded. "The only thing I could think to do is to call UNIT, but before I could dash off to find a phone box, there was a tremendous roar and a giant spaceship appeared over our heads. I'm surprised you didn't hear it, even out here."

Sarah was too and she had her suspicions about that, but she kept them quiet for now.

"It hovered over the Thames and nearly crashed into the Houses of Parliament. Then a hatch opened and there was another octopus, bigger than the one on the river. They talked to each other, as far as I could tell. And then they reached out an arm towards each other, the big one pulled the little one on board, and they closed the hatch. It flew off over my head and I had to throw myself to the ground to avoid having my head taken off."

Sarah looked at him closely and noticed he didn't have a scratch on him. That must have been very soft ground he'd thrown himself on.

"So then I went and got the escape pod and you'll never guess what I found inside."

"I probably won't," she agreed. "You might as well tell me." He looked like he was itching to.

"Eggs! Big octopus eggs."

She raised her eyebrows. "Where are they now?"

"I called UNIT and they came and took everything away. They're incubating the eggs, hoping they can teach the youngsters English, then they can tell us about their race."

Sarah wondered if, despite being a doctor, Harry knew the slightest thing about biology. Given that she'd heard nothing at all about this on the news (and she'd watched a lot of it while she'd been waiting), and UNIT weren't that good at covering up alien invasions, Sarah doubted most of his story. It wasn't the first tale Harry had told her and most of those had been exaggerated, if not a complete lie. But something must have happened and if it was by the Thames that would account for his clothes being wet. Mind you, being Harry, he could have just fallen in. "How much of that was actually true?"

Harry stood up. "Didn't you say something about bed?" he asked, changing the subject and holding out a hand. When she didn't move he added, "Does it matter?"

He had told an entertaining story and she had forgotten all her worry and anger. And bed might be the best place to tease the real story out of him. So she smiled at him, took his hand and let him lead her to the bedroom.

Cross posted from Angelic Paranoia - Fan Fiction
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